Working Mom Wednesday // FEB 2024
Working Mom Wednesdays – A Celebration of Supermoms! Every month, I’ll feature an inspiring working mom you’ll love getting to know!
This month, I’m thrilled to introduce you to Elise Grable! Not only is she a marketing director & designer, writer, entrepreneur, and all around amazing person, she happens to be one of my dearest friends. (Fun fact: Elise was a bridesmaid in my wedding!) She’s the kind of friend you can have a three-hour heart-to-heart with one day, and call with a fashion emergency the next. As she shares in the Q&A below, she’s navigated infidelity, divorce, and trauma. Her resilience is unmatched and her faith is deep — the kind only formed through walking through the really hard stuff and coming out on the other side. Elise is a mom of three, ages 26, 18, and 15. You can read more of her journey at Starling Stories and follow her on Instagram here.
What’s keeping your plate full personally and professionally?
Professionally, I'm approaching the 1-year mark as a designer for Heritage Custom Homes. I also handle a portion of their marketing. This is my first time working remotely (which I've always thought would be a disaster), but I LOVE IT! This has been a dream job for me, but there was a steep learning curve, and our clientele is growing/keeping me on my toes. My husband and I started a design biz (Starling Designs) just a few months before we BOTH started working for Heritage. We haven't had the time we planned on pouring into our own business since we both changed careers at the same time, but we've still accomplished some pretty great things including the interiors for Cornerstone Realtors and Great American Title.
Personally, our youngest son is a freshman in high school and on the water polo/swim team. He's in the water by 6am Mon-Fri plus matches and meets… so I'm basically an unpaid Uber driver. Our family bought a fixer upper 3 years ago and we've slowly been remodeling the house ourselves. Read that as: our home is in various stages of completion. A good portion of my downtime is spent in women's ministry. I regularly meet with women to listen, encourage, and pray. (Not a counselor, but I love bringing people to the feet of Jesus!) This month, a friend and I are launching a new women's group at our church that meets once a month over brunch. I can't wait!
Do you work primarily out of passion (because you want to), out of need for provision, or a combination of both?
In the past, I viewed work as a burden—almost like something you get sentenced to. I worked part-time as a hobby when my kids were young, but I was primarily a SAHM. I went through a traumatic divorce in 2015 and work became a necessity. It terrified me and I felt completely inadequate. My first experience working outside the home after 10yrs was my church hiring me for 2 roles: a receptionist and a part time housekeeper. Life was very difficult in that season, but I grew so much and it was definitely a soft place to land. I see work differently now: work has flexed muscles in me that I didn't know I had. I LIKE those muscles. I'm a more capable woman because of work. And honestly? In tough seasons, I have come to enjoy being able to set aside my personal life and accomplish something professionally. It kept me sane on more than one occasion! I still need to work out of provision, but now I would still choose to work even if it wasn't required.
What does a typical day look like for you? How do you juggle it all?
I get up at 5:30am (6am if my stud of a husband takes our son to school for swim). When we get home from school drop-off, Josh and I take our dogs on a 2 mile walk. I'm sitting at my computer with a London Fog and ready to work by 7:30am. If I have client meetings, I commute 30 min to my boss' house, but I'm typically working from a comfy chair in my home (I really should get a desk because I'm developing neck issues. Anyone else had this bad habit bite them?)
How does being a working mom impact your kids?
I think it's important for our kids (and spouses, if that pertains to you) to see us as more than 1 note. Growing up, I didn't see many possibilities as a mother. I definitely didn't see women being celebrated for working outside the home. My kids watched me transition from SAHM to working mom and I watched them learn to respect me in new ways. They began to value my time more and their fear that I wouldn't be as accessible diminished as they continued to see my consistency in their life.
What holds the biggest tension for you in trying to manage everything right now? (i.e. childcare, meal prep, mom guilt, friendship, being a single mom, your marriage, etc.)
Oh gosh… if my house is clean, I probably didn't work out. If I worked out, I probably didn't do the laundry. I feel like life is less of a balancing act and more like a juggling act: I can't have my hands on everything I'm handed, but I can keep a close eye on things as they leave my hands because I know I'll rhythmically circle back to it. I hope that makes sense. Lol!
What's one resource, tip, or trick that makes your working mom life easier?
Any chance I have to show myself some grace at home is really helping keep stress down. I try to keep some things on reserve with this specific topic in mind; not for regularly busy nights; an actual game plan for when I need grace. And I let my family know "this is a grace night:
I keep a few restaurant gift cards for a spontaneous family night out (or take out).
When my kids were little, I kept an envelope of cash as an emergency babysitting fund.
Sometimes I just announce that I'll be wondering the aisles of Homegoods BY MYSELF for the next hour and my phone will be turned off.
What advice or encouragement would you share with a working momma who is feeling overwhelmed right now?
"If I say yes to one thing, I'm saying no to something else." Don't try to do it all. Find some things to say no to, and create some margin in your life.
How are you fueling your spiritual life right now? Anything you would share or recommend to others on this front?
I listen to the Bible almost every day. I try to be intentional about stopping to pray as my mind lingers on problems or people. My husband and I pray together every night (this also helps us know what is heavy on each other's hearts and regularly spurs deeper conversations with each other). One way that helps me get a temperature on my kids' spiritual life is asking, "What is the last thing God said to you?" We have had the coolest conversations from that question! I also loooove the podcast: Back Porch Theology with Lisa Harper.
Any final thoughts?
I was married to my first husband for 15yrs. We had 2 sons together and were in the process of adopting our 17yr old daughter when our marriage fell apart. God has walked hand-in-hand with me through physical and sexual abuse as a child, infidelity as an adult, divorce, and so much trauma. I spent 5yrs as a single, working mom. During that season I began writing and speaking about healing from trauma. My blog is www.StarlingStories.com. I rarely write there, but I'm still having the most beautiful and vulnerable conversations with people on IG (@starling_stories) and FB (Starling Stories). I've never lost my passion for writing and I'm praying God gives me more opportunity to do so in the future. I met my husband in August 2019 and we were married June 2020 (hello C*vid wedding!). I call him my unicorn because I didn't think men like him existed. He calls me his narwhal. LOL!
Being a working mom can feel like work all on its own, and nobody understands better than other working moms! Afterall, we are better together! After hearing feedback from countless other working mommas over the last several years, we are creating a community (via Facebook Group) where you can connect with each other, ask questions, celebrate wins, process challenges, crowd source ideas, and share meaningful faith convos. And at the end of the day, we are all-in to cheer each other on!
Click here to join the Working Mom Recharge Facebook Group! I hope you will visit often to connect, encourage, and find helpful insights for all things working-mom-life! I hope every time you visit, your soul will feel recharged!